i don't plan on having that self control this summer
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
