We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
You took a bar mat shot.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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