We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Randomize
