I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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