so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
