she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
He kissed a someone with a penis
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
