Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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