I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
