if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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