living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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