No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Randomize
