Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
