If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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