She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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