how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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