You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Randomize
