Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
