So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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