Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
