I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Randomize
