I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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