So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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