Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
