i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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