sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
