I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
