Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
