would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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