ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
