SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
