awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize