stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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