it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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