Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
