so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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