The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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