We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
She just used a chaser for red wine.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
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