just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
