Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
