is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Farmville is her only friend.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
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