But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
