2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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