he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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