he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
