Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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