I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
