So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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