I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
