I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
