I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
